So, I've decided to post more often, and (probably) less each time. No long stories about why I haven't been posting, but I'll do more. Promise. If anyone is still reading.
And why "Commuting"?
It's the bane of my existence. It's what I blame for this constant sense of struggle, of not wanting to wish these days away, while basically, at least sometimes (daily), wishing them away - wishing I didn't have to drag my kids on the tube in rush hour every day, wishing I could find some way to get more work done (or at least feel great about what I'm doing while I'm doing it), to spend more quality time with the girls while they are small and precious and still in the mode where doing things with me is such an obvious joy, get more, and more reliable sleep, go out more and hence have a better relationship with A., and fix all the remaining irritating, ugly, things about the house. And find some way to have music in my life: buy a piano (ie convince Amps that I have, 20 years after leaving home and 8 years after finishing a PhD; 5 years after getting my first permanent academic job, actually finally waited enough already) ... and play the new piano. And take some holiday: we never go anywhere and once Nina starts school it'll be harder, we'll have to take time (if we ever do) when everyone else does.
And don't even get me started on the disaster that is the state of our plans for this summer. As of now, we have one way tickets to Spain; we'll be there indefinitely as of late July.
So, back to commuting. Sometimes we ride our bakfiets, and we all like it. But today I had this cough, the tail of the zillionth cold, and it was rainy. I don't mind if it's rainy on the way back but I do draw the line at getting soaked before my day even starts. And the wind was just howling.
Today's morning trip was ok. The train came pretty soon (it always does but if we wait 2-3 minutes it's full, due to the law of cumulative lateness -- all the previous stations have had a wait too, and the train gets packed). We got seats at King's Cross. Annika smiled at me and was happy and gorgeous. The bus from Knightsbridge came soon, and we had a seat. Arrival: 9:30. Office: 9:45. The trip back was a pain; Nina was terribly whiny about how she wanted to run on the ramp, then didn't to do so enough, blah blah whiny whiny blah whiny whiny all the way to the tube basically. Annika just about had her first full on tantrum when I took the water bottle away from her after the 2nd time I had to retrieve the lid she was playing with. Little monster hit me in the face. I got desperate enough to take some pictures on my phone, just to entertain them; they look delightfully happy in the pictures. Left office: 5pm. Left nursery: 5:24pm. Arrival at home (after a brief 3-min stop at the shop to get much-needed Leffe and Hoegaarden): 6:23pm. Did that take me the better part of 90 minutes? Yes. Damn, where my life goes.
1 comment:
I'm stil reading and I'm still in awe that you do that with 2 kids. Guess it really is as hard as it seems :( I'm sorry. Any creative ideas? Could you work from home a couple days a week and make A. take them in??
I'm very excited to hear that you will be indefinitely in Spain as of July. Maybe you should just stay. It is warmer there.
There is a carriage house here that you can stay in indefinitely if you get sick of it all. At least you would not be cold.
big hugs, Jess
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